The unexamined life is not worth living.
-Socrates
When my marriage broke up and I was finally done with my pity party I had some amazing revelations about the POSITIVE aspects of my relationship.
It was so liberating and enlightening to realize that every relationship...
provides an opportunity for personal growth. When I stopped blaming and bashing my ex I started to see myself and my lessons. Granted, this took awhile – I enjoyed focusing on his horrific traits and I let the drama run my life because it was easier than looking at myself… but there comes a time when you have to face the music.
I had a clear vision of the type of man I wanted in my life, but I had to ask myself – do I have the traits of the person I’m looking for? Have I become the person I want to attract? I got one big resounding NO! So I started asking for guidance to see what I need to see so that I could heal and become more whole.
Here are five things I looked at that gave me a positive perspective and much needed spiritual growth:
1. Time’s Up – everything I came together to learn with this person has been taught – there is nothing more to gain and it’s time to move on.
2. Season – he was in my life to help me learn to share, grow and learn. We had some amazing times together that need to be honored and appreciated. We played and developed the adventurous inner child.
3. The Mirror – things he did that drove me absolutely insane were a mirror to my own unconscious actions. Very enlightening once I allowed myself to see this.
4. Daddy Replay – the realization that I had chosen a man with so many similar traits to my father was eye opening. You hear this all the time but somehow you get blind sighted in your own relationship. Journaling and work with a therapist helped me clarify, resolve and heal my past.
5. Lifetime lessons – honestly looking at the positives and negatives made me realize everything was a gift for my emotional foundation. I can now use this as a springboard for building more solid relationships in all area’s of my life.
It’s a happy day when you go from victim to a woman of substance!
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